I have had a pause from GaN growth since two weeks ago. It is actually good time to pull back myself from the hectic of growth ritual, where I can read, observe other group works and at the same time (try to) design experimental procedure what to do next. Surprisingly, it is not easy as I though before. To find out what is wrong, what is missing, something to be fixed and improved are tough work. Such kind of works have exhausted my mind to some sense. I tried different ways to implement what so-called active reading of those papers and it turns out to be a little bit better and effective, at least.
One or two questions are popped out in my mind while reading a paper. Sometimes they even do not appear at all. “This is a perfect paper!”, as it has been cited by many other authors. However, the questions which I can find after “digging” diligently throughout the paper, are not superb or wow. I can say that active reading is not easy at all. I may need more and more hours to sharpen this skill.
Most of the time, I have a wonder how is it possible for most academicians and intellectuals that they can easily point out something that is not “right”, just few minutes after they have read a paper or listened to a presentation. Just within some time, a new idea that I have not thought about it, a paper has been published. A friend joke about how these group of people have a dedicated “print” button on their PC for publishing their research data. The critical thinking and active reading which are normally attributed as something that hard enough to be grasped (at least for me), are they transformed into their instinct? Just like how human perceive hunger and without any further thought, he/she will look after food.
Such a disappointment of not having ability like them, has aroused many times for these past two weeks. No, I think even more than that. Such an inevitable circumstance since I have decided myself to start living my life in this way. Not easy path to live in, but I hope I will have such kind of instinct like that one day.